For those of you who know (and don’t know) me.. I am a massive fan of great movies. And when I say great movies, I really mean it.
Oftentimes, what may seem like a usual movie for some people can be an extraordinary movie for me – then again, it all based on one’s perspective. And mood! Mood plays a big role. Your mood when you’re watching movie obviously influences how you perceive it. But with truly great movies, even when I am not in the mood, it’s like I’m under a spell – I pay attention, even to the tiniest details.
And I stumbled upon a movie: Only Yesterday by Studio Ghibli. If you’re in the mood for a relatable, slow-paced film and you feel that a little emotional hug won’t hurt, go for this one guys! It is a 90’s masterpiece *brb crying* and the fact that it was released in 1991!
The story is quite simple. Taeko Okajima is on her way from Tokyo to Yamagata. During the train ride, she recalls some memories from her 10-year-old self, back when she was in primary school. These flashbacks, expand from her life as the youngest child, her school days, her first love, and her coming-of-age moments. It’s all simple, yet heartwarming at the same time.
Taeko is the youngest of three sisters. She is very cute and talented, but unfortunately, she’s had to rely on herself from the beginning. She is curious, but no one pays much attention to her questions. She doesn’t like certain things, but she is told not to be picky and to just accept whatever is given. Meanwhile, her sisters seem to be just… fine.
Let me share some of my favorite scenes from the movie:
The countryside trip
When she was young, all of her friends were going to countryside in Japan during the holiday. She asked her mother if she could go too. I remember her mother’s response “We don’t have relatives in the country, so don’t ask.” At first, it seemed like a normal scene – parents simply saying no to something they couldn’t provide. But it stuck with me.
The pineapple
Her father once bought a pineapple – something unfamiliar to them at the time. They kept it until one day, her mother came home and and they sliced it up. As excited as everyone was, most of the family did not like the taste (maybe because pineapple can be a bit sour). Taeko, who had always been told not to be picky, forced herself to eat it even though she did not like it too much as well. And since no one else wanted theirs, they gave their portions to Taeko. She eats it all.
The math class
In school, she once got a low grade for math, specifically on fraction division. Her mother was speechless because it was supposed to be an easy topic. Her mother told her to study with her sister. Taeko wanted to learn from her eldest sister, Nanako, but since Nanako was not home yet, she had to learn from Yaeko. Yaeko was very… fussy. Also shocked about Taeko’s grade, Yaeko tried to teach her the method to solve the Math problem. Being curious as Taeko is, she asked about the concept behind the method. But Yaeko could not explain it:
Yaeko: Sit.
Yaeko: Say your times table from the top.
Taeko: I know that. I’m in fifth grade already!
Yaeko: Then why so many mistakes?
Taeko: It’s dividing fractions.
Yaeko: Just flip the top and the bottom and multiply.
Yaeko: They taught you that, right?
Yaeko: Then why do you get it wrong?
Taeko: Yaeko, one step at a time.
Taeko: What’s dividing a fraction by a fraction anyway?
Taeko: Two-thirds of an apple divided by a quarter means…
Taeko: How this would be divided among four people, right?
Taeko: So, it’s one, two, three, four, five, six…
Taeko: one-sixth each, right?
Yaeko: No, no, no, no. That’s multiplication.
Taeko: How come it’s less when you multiply?
Taeko: Two-thirds of an apple divided by a quarter…
Yaeko: Forget about apples.
Yaeko: Just remember to invert and multiply.
And the conversation between Nanako, Yaeko, and Mother:
Mother: If she got half right, it’d be worth scolding her.
Yaeko: Right.
Nanako: Should you get her IQ checked?
Mother: They said it was fine when she started.
Yaeko: Maybe she turned dumb?
Nanako: Remember she fell down the stairs as a baby?
Yaeko: Right, in her walker!
Yaeko: I thought she was dead.
Mother: It was just a bump.
Nanako: It’s affecting her now.
Yaeko: That’s it!
Mother: Nonsense. She’s just no good at math.
When she was young, her class had a drama session. Taeko improvised during the performance and she was great (she really was, guys! you’d expect her teacher to say so). Instead, her teacher said “Very good everyone. But let’s stick to the script.” *smiling in bitterness*. Apparently, after the play, a university student came to Taeko’s house to speak with her mother. The student invited Taeko to join a town event as part of the cast. Taeko, overheard the conversation, was overjoyed. She started herself becoming a child star one day. During dinner, the family excitedly talked about the invitation until:
Taeko’s Father: Acting is out.
Taeko’s Father: Show business people are no good.
Nanako: “Show business”… Don’t exaggerate…
Taeko’s Mother: That’s right. It’s…
Takeo’s Father: I said no.
And when Taeko’s friend, Aoki, got to play the part instead,
Taeko: Aoki’s going to play the part instead.
Taeko’s Mother: I see.
Taeko: She’s boasting to everyone.
Taeko’s Mother: I see.
Taeko: Today her mom met her at school to get her changed into a fancy dress.
Taeko: A frilly thing out to here…
Taeko’s Mother: Taeko?
Taeko’s Mother: Don’t tell anyone you got the first offer.
Taeko’s Mother: Because that would hurt Aoki very much.
Taeko’s Mother: Do you understand?
Taeko’s Mother: Do you understand?
How could we avoid hurting Aoki’s heart, yet end up hurting Taeko’s instead?
And the list goes on and on and on – to the point where it becomes ironic 🙂
Beside, There are also some cute and sweet parts that will remind you of your 10-year-old self. One sweet scene is when 10-year-old Taeko, on her way home, meets Hirota :
Hirota: Rainy days, cloudy days, sunny days… which do you like?
Taeko: …cloudy days.
Hirota: Oh, then we’re alike.
It’s a simple scene but there, it will make your heart go mushy with a smile on your face 🙂
Eventually, our Taeko is extremely enjoying her time in Yamagata. Oh, and also, our Taeko gets her happy ending with Toshio, not with her first love Hirota-kun, as you might have imagined in your head haha.
But in the journey of giving her heart to Toshio, there was Taeko and her life reminiscence. There was a journey when of remembering why she became who she is – Taeko. And as written in Ghibli’s site: The key to Taeko’s future, lies in her past. In the final scene, where she rides in a car with Toshio, her 10-year-old self appears alongside her. It shows that Taeko is with Taeko. Her younger self never left. The younger Taeko embraces the present Taeko, giving her and walking alongside her to accept her future self.
In one way or another, we will have questions for ourselves when heading into the future. In making decisions. In weighing A or B. In choosing ourselves. Self-discovery is not easy. Understanding ourselves doesn’t happen with the snap of a finger. Accepting ourselves is a journey..
And as we walk through this journey, will we make peace with our younger selves?
will our younger selves embrace us?
will our younger selves release us to become our future selves?
will the 10-year-old version of us look at us and smile?
unfiltered 